Friends?

That's a strange word. A friend has taken on a new meaning today, but if you remember the old meaning (c'mon, take a trip back with me): you may have fought during the week, but were back to liking each other by week's end; you stayed the night at each other's houses, you joked with each other and everything was cool, laughter was a must! Now, kids fight and don't let go of the grudge. If the fruit is turning up rotten, spoiled, or judged harshly--what's wrong with the tree? What's wrong with the environment the fruit is being brought up in? Just food for thought...

I really love my friends. They are good for me and to me. There are some people that I consider to be acquaintances: people I know who I'm not too sure of his/her character yet. Yes, I understand them but sometimes their actions or words can lead them to trouble. If you're associated with them, they could lead you to trouble, too.

God is one friend that has remained a constant. He never changes or leaves. Sometimes things happen harsh because: a) life ain't fair, b) there's a lesson to be learned and c) it's really good for our character. We become stronger and valued because of our adversities. If you fight with human friends, pray. If you really want the answer, wait on it. If you're confused, still wait for His answer--it will come.

Father, I thank you for both the positive and negative outcomes I've experienced thus far.

The Pieces of Your Blessing

You know, sometimes the blessing is staring you in the face and you may not realize it. Over the years here at the same job, I've met some really nasty acting people. They have the biggest attitudes ever. Loud in talking, using all caps in messages, these people are a journey (meeting them was the trip)! But I've realized that sometimes your image, your habits, your issues that you want and need to correct are being realized through these people. If you listen carefully to them, watch their mannerisms (with you and others) and they'll tell you about one person--yourself. God will allow your reflection to show in others. Are you showing yourself friendly? Are you being positive and helpful as much as possible (i.e. are you loving thy neighbor as yourself). Sometimes you just need to, not just do you, but work on you.

The difference: to work on you, you're taking a candid, hard look at yourself in the present and agreeing to change what's needed. Baby steps are what's needed, and they are often the hardest to take. Dare yourself to be true to yourself--you deserve it.

Lord, help me to be honest with myself to make ground-breaking changes that will bring me closer to you. Amen.

New Lease on Life

Yesterday, I got a favorable report from my second opinion: I'm okay. I don't have to worry or be afraid of anything anymore. While I may not be able to have children of my own someday, I'm okay with that. God has given me much more and from that I see that my cup runneth over.

Endometriosis (short version) is when the uterine lining finds its way outside of the uterus. It can cause severe bleeding, major pain and more headaches in life than a woman should be allowed to have. For years, I was the woman with the issue of blood. I suffered for 18 years before I knew what the condition was even called. I was labeled as just "having a problem" with mood swings and irritability. I didn't know what was going on, just that I was different.

I decided to get a second opinion, after much debate, because I wanted to make sure no treatment option was missed (besides birth control pills or surgery). The information I was reading from different websites and what other patients have been through put me on the path to a full or partial hysterectomy and more pain or pills that make your moods so bad you physically want to hurt people. It was a dangerous time for me. I'm changed pills and am beginning to exercise more. I'm watching my food intake (I don't like the word diet--yuck). With God and much favor, I'm where I'm supposed to be. On this journey, I'm learning to be more relaxed and anxious for nothing. I'm more confident in myself than I've ever been and I'm ready for the next phases in my life.

The world says children and husband are the next logical steps! But does God say that for everyone? No. At first, that was a tough pill to swallow: that I would not be able to have a family right away. Something I've dreamed of for years that still has not manifested into a bright reality. Along the way, I've met other friends who are like family and have just as much fun. My glass was always full, but I saw it as have empty. Now, I'm stepping up and out into a new life.

Father, thank you for this new lease on life and the greatest opportunity to learn, to grow, and to trust You even more. I love You!